I felt some Bacon, in my Brain

. . . would make for a more entertaining and delicious poem, I think.

Lyrics websites are the worst. They take five times as long to load as any other website, they're loaded with scary advertisements, they're probably giving my computer a lot of viruses, and only a few of them are letting me copy and paste the lyrics. Thankfully, I have the lyrics to "Animal" printed out, and I have a few ideas. I need some more ideas, and then I need to rework these lyrics.

Today, I had 72 percent dark chocolate, and I felt very sophisticated.

That's all I have to say about that, so I'll move on. I've noticed that I'm still the only person who voted "Yes!" for bacon frappuccino, which is extremely baffling to me. Bacon might not be my favorite food, but it is my favorite scent, and anything bacon flavored is wonderful. Hear me out, Starbucks. "Why does the Internet like bacon so much?" Listen to John and Hank for an answer.

Bacon, bacon, bacon. Did you know that Meijer discontinued my favorite snack? My mom would have to go to Meijer every week and get two or three boxes of "bacon crackers," but apparently I was the only one who liked them, so they don't exist anymore.

One time, I was in the shower, and I could smell the bacon that my mom was making. Do you know how impressive that is? The bacon smell traveled all the way from the kitchen to the bathroom door, went through the tiny crack at the bottom, spread out within the volume of the bathroom, and caught my attention even with the other prominent smells of water and Suave for Men shampoo. That's crazy. Bacon is awesome!

Until next time, Max,
What is all this juice and all this joy? Bacon. I mean, Spring.