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Guess what today is, Bryan!

TOP TEN TO THE TUESDAY!

Today’s topic, you ask?  My top ten favorite animals!

Shut up word, the first sentence should not say, “Guess what Bryan is!” nor should the last sentence be un-fragmentized.  Now it is yelling at me about word order.  Dear Microsoft, SHUT UP!

Seahorse:  The males give birth.  That may be the strangest thing ever.  Once I got past that very disturbing fact, I was amazed at just how odd looking they are.  I really cannot find many pros to seahorses, but they  are just so strange that they have to make my list.

Turtles:  Bryan, the hubris of the turtle has to be its slow lifestyle.  If there were to be faster turtles, then I really do not know what could beat out an animal the size of my foot that can hide inside of its shell whenever it feels like it.

Kangaroos:  I really love kangaroos, if only because they live in Australia.  In addition, they call their young “Joeys,” which is actually a human’s name!  Bryan, how can you not love Kangaroo Jack?

Squirrels:  Ever since I saw the movie UP, squirrels have just become that much better!  Anything that has half of its size come from one body part (its tail) has to be an awesome animal in my book.

Dogs:  Let me clarify, Bryan.  When I say dogs, I mean medium sized dogs.  Too big and dogs become scary, but too little and they are just annoying.  I like a lap dog that does not squash me, but I cannot accidentally squash it.

Aye-Ayes:  Take a monkey, lemur and witch and combine them all into one super-primate.  You have an aye-aye.   They are one of the ugliest animals on the face of the planet, which makes them ever so adorable.  Don’t you just want to pet one?

Ducks:  Bryan, for one, duck is a fun word to say.  They waddle and quack.  This not only makes them annoying, but also ever so fun mock.  We all know, mockery is one of my favorite games.

Penguins:  They are a bird that cannot fly.  Need I say more?  In addition, they waddle much like a duck, but they do not quack.  The dads stand on their babies to keep them warm while the mom goes and hunts for food.

Zebras:  Zebras are long time favorites of mine because of their awesome pattern, but alas, their boringness has led to their inevitable defeat on this list.

Kiwis:  I do not mean the fruit, Bryan.  Native to New Zealand, kiwis are short, plump birds that are the most awesome things in existence.

Until tomorrow, Bryan.

Want to go to the petting zoo?